Friday, January 30, 2009

Task Forces, Envoys and Czars, Oh My!

Middle Class Working Families Task Force

This is the dumbest thing I've heard of. Or maybe I am just biased because I think Biden is a turd burglar.

Good job making your point. You came off very mature and articulate.

Thanks, buddy.

No problem.

Joe Torre's a Whorre

You can always count on David Wells for a memorable quote.

David Wells calls Torre a male prostitute?

When I heard early this morning that Wells had said Torre was a punk, I thought it was odd, generally a punk is young person something which Joe Torre is certainly not. Then I noticed the above article/post/whatever and learned that a punk can also mean a male prostitute. I guess that's what David Wells meant*, but it still seems a little odd.

Whats wrong with just plain A-hole, Boomer?

As a sidenote, I think all this controversy about Joe Torre's book is awesome. Anything that humiliates the Yankees is great fun.

*I know that's not what he really meant, its just that punk is a pretty silly name to call a 70 year old man.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[breathe]

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Goo World

screenshot_193515 I don't often sing the praises of video games. I don't play that often any more, but I thought I'd share my opinion about a game I recently downloaded for the Wii called World of Goo.

It's awesome.

A puzzley physicsy game where you build towers and bridges with balls of goo. Simple concept, but it's engrossing and thoroughly enjoyable.

Available for the PC or Mac as well as the Wii

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Adventures in Coding

So, let's say your a web developer. What's the first thing you probably learned way back when you were just starting out? I'll hazard a guess and say, making a page with a couple of fields in it like text boxes, and for the really advanced a drop down list, where a user could enter some information, click a button and that information would get saved or sent somewhere.

Sounds about right, huh?

For the non-web developers out there, here's an example of the previously mentioned drop down list that would get added to a page.

<select name="YouAreADunce">
<option value="0">Yes
<option value="1">No
</select>

Rendered as:


Pretty basic stuff for a web developer, no?

Good, I'm glad you agree with me. At least I know that my irritation at the coworker with the fat salary, five page resume and computer science degree who couldn't figure out why a drop down list that Thing 1 just added to a page was returning a 0 or a 1 and not "Yes" or "No" when Thing 1 submitted the form was justified.

Ok, so you don't know anything about web development. Nothing. Zero. Nada. It doesn't matter. Its a simple problem to figure out. The answer is RIGHT THERE.

"Hmm. I was expecting 'Yes' but I got '0'. I wonder why. Oh, look, '0' is the value of that drop down item. That must be why I am getting a '0'. I want a 'Yes' so let me change that value from '0' to 'Yes'."

Of course, why Thing 1 is using Request.Form to get the values of the form fields in the code-behind of a .NET page is a WTF for another day. I wasn't going to touch that with a ten foot pole.

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

I Don't Know. You Tell Me

It really bugs me when someone asks me a question and it’s readily apparent that they have spent ZERO time investigating it on their own.

My irritation increases exponentially by how quickly I am able to answer their question.

I don’t think I am going to answer questions any more.

Friday, January 16, 2009

Stankmouth

onion_mThing 2 consistently has some of the worst breath I've ever had to deal with in the workplace. You ever know a guy in high school who would burp with his mouth closed and then blow a sulfurous cloud of burp at you? Well, Thing 2 does this. Not maliciously or with intent to cause harm, I know. It's just a lack o'social skill. While I can forgive a deficiency in propriety to a certain extent and accept the fact that Thing 2's intentions are not to purposely burn the hair off my face with each breath, it still does not make giving a self-described "Web Developer" tutorials on HTML tables any more palatable.

Is Pick-up Available?

Hands down the most exorbitant shipping charges I have ever seen on my least favorite web site.

image

Thing 1 and Thing 2

cd2e1cf7a1b5aaba12da73ccff11b07a Two of my recently hired coworkers I am dubbing Thing 1 and Thing 2. I will say nothing about their gender, orientation, religion or creed, just that as web developers they leave a lot to be desired. Every day, at least once, a question is asked that boggles my mind with its stupidity. These are my peers complete with five page resumes and computer science degrees and they cannot solve basic problems by themselves.

Somebody was lying.

These two are a gold mine of blog content and I intend to start mining.

An IM between me and Thing 1. Names have been blurred to protect he innocent. I am the red blur.

kidding

Kip Journal 6/2/1999

Trained with Kip yesterday, he truly acts as though he has Cerebral Palsy.

Read the Kip Journal FAQ

Kip Journal 5/19/1999

Saw Kip in the cafeteria in Bldg 35. Tried to avoid him, but he caught me anyway.

[Forgot all about the Kip Journal. Only a few left. Ed.]

Read the Kip Journal FAQ

Hi

A person has spoken and I shall start posting more often. To recap the past few weeks...

I cooked a duck on Christmas. It was excellent, but the dollar to meat ratio was very high. Here's a picture of it right before I tossed it into the oven:

And the giblets and neck simmering on the stove:

Duck is fattier than chicken. When handling the raw bird compared to a chicken the skin felt thick. Kinda like what I imagine Wil Ferrell would feel like if I were to poke him in the chest. My kids have never seen me eat a heart before. I've been remiss...

I rode to New Hampshire with my in-laws:

And New Hampshire didn't disappoint...All my youngest son could say was, "It's snowing. That's awesome."

Met my two new nephews, of which I won't post any pictures because I didn't seek the expressed written consent of their parents.

And in my spare time I've begun acquiring speakers for a killer surround system to go along with the receiver I got for Christmas:

Capri-sun added for scale. Front speakers and a subwoofer coming soon.

Monday, January 12, 2009

This Is It

JimRice-744272 The last chance for Jim Rice to get voted into the Hall of Fame because it is his 15th and last year of eligibility. Yeah, I know the veteran's committee can vote him in, but they almost never vote anyone in.

The past few years I have lamented the fact that he has been denied entrance into the Hall, but this year I have changed my mind. I don't think he deserves it, and my sincere hope is that he does not receive enough votes in this, his final year on the ballot. The baseball writers know best because they are smart, articulate and truly care about baseball. They are the Guardians of our National Pastime. And they have a real flair for web design (caution: retinal damage may occur). Who are we to question Them?

Update: HE GOT IN! My pseudo-reverse psychology worked!

Book Report: The Sound and the Fury

The Sound and the FuryThe book so nice I had to read it twice... Seriously, I was about halfway through before it all suddenly clicked and the characters and timeline made sense. So when I finished it I went back and read the first half again. I'm glad I did. It was worth it.

Thursday, January 08, 2009

More iPod

I just discovered what the Hold button does. Brilliant! Two years I've had this thing. Dumb!

Tuesday, January 06, 2009

iPods Are Great

but iTunes sucks. Just my opinion. I welcome yours.

Monday, January 05, 2009

My Eyes Deceive Me

Its good to see handsome young men still getting work in this economy.

image