Monday, August 31, 2009

Bacon is Good Except When It's Bad

I found two packages of bacon in my fridge on Saturday (August 29). One was marked as "best used by" Sept 1 2009 and the other Aug 30. In my finite wisdom I decided to cook both of them, since they were both about to "expire", and planned on using the leftovers for BLTs or in a salad or something. Anything. I just didn't want the bacon to go to waste.

The Sept 1 package was cooked first and intended for immediate consumption for dinner (yes, all you redneckophobes we were having breakfast for dinner). And I should disclose that I did in fact smell the bacon before cooking to make sure it wasn't funky before I cooked it. After the first package was all cooked and the scrambled eggs were still simmering, I did steal a piece from the paper towel lined plate. It tasted disappointingly "not fresh". Not bad enough to prevent it being eaten at dinner though, but enough to know that this bacon was not smoked yesterday.

I opened up the second package, the Aug 30 one, and took a whiff. And tossed it into the trash. It had definitely taken a turn for the worse.

Whats the point of expiration dates? I drank some milk last week that was a good 3 or 4 days past its date and it was great, but I had to throw away some of God's bounty because it was rotten a full day before it was supposed to be.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Closer Than They Appear

I have no idea why I took a picture of this Ford. It must have been really compelling.

A Grand National. Hard to see but it was a really beat up one. It was burning oil pretty bad. You know that sound that ladies make when they see a picture of a lost kitten? That's the sound I made when I saw this poor car.

A Dodge with a crazy amount of lift. I took this picture because I usually think that Dodges look kind of stupid with too much lift, but this one didn't. I don't know if it was the fender flares or what, but it looked good. If you are into that kind of thing.

A LeMans convertible off to get murdered in the Cash for Clunkers deal, no doubt.

A Lincoln maybe? I'm not sure.

Tell me what this car is and I will say that you are cool.

The ugliest car ever to come out of Detroit? Possibly, but it is more commonly known as a Cutlass, probably 1976, but I am just guessing.

Okey Dokey

The seat was already up, but I peed on it anyway out of principle.

It reminds me of a sign I wanted to hang in the bathroom at work but never did "Flush the urinal and wipe your boogers off the wall, ahole"


Our IT guy has a really loud voice and woke her up about 30 seconds after I snapped this shot. He did the same thing yesterday, but before I could get my phone out. I asked him to keep the noise down in the future :)

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Fabulous TV Review©

Flight of the Conchords - Season 2
I recently finished the second season of Flight of the Conchords and I was not disappointed. Just as good as the first. I don't think there are any plans for a third season and thats fine with me. Why mess with a good thing? *cough* The Office *cough*. You owe it to yourself to watch this show.

Anyway, my favorite episode from Season 2 is Unnatural Love. Here's a short bit courtesy of the Utubes. I won't give anything away except to say that Bret and Jemaine are from New Zealand.

9 out of 10 (Wicked awesome)

Take the Wheel

A funny thing I did on a recent road trip to New Hampshire was sing that song by Carrie Underwood, Jesus Take the Wheel, but change the lyrics to bad things that people do while driving.

"Jesus take the wheeeeeel, I need to send a text message"


"I haaaad too much Ziiima"


"I need to finish my maaaake up"

I don't know. It seemed funnier when my wife was driving and I was bugging her and the kids were laughing. Oh well. It's funny to me and that's all I care about. Me.

Polyester Leisure Suits

I did a little Disco ASP work today. Wasn't particularly fun. It's funny how Disco ASP can run untouched for a long time and then suddenly break catastrophically for no apparent reason. Debugging it is the worst...

Fabulous Movie Review©

Ok, I was expecting a The Longest Yard comedy and instead I got a decidedly non funny period piece set in my least favorite time period of history, the 1920s.

Bah. It was boring. And I don't like Renee Zellweger much.

3.5 out of 10 (Very very bad)

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Telling the Truth

I like how this guy started to use the well worn excuse "not enough time" in describing why he is selling an unfinished project, but then something clicked in his brain and he said to himself "aw screw it. I'll just tell the truth".

Here's the text of the craigslist ad, because you know how those will disappear eventually or suddenly:

1979 honda xl185s wont take much to get her going too many projects not enough time/wife not happy about more broken stuff at house


They've been sandblasting the overpass right outside my building. It started the week before I went on vacation, apparently continued during my vacation and is still going on now. It's a diesel powered trailer mounted sandblaster and it's freaking loud. I thought that I would get used to it, but I haven't.

On the bright side, it keeps Thing 1 awake and I can't hear her phone conversations as much.


I wish Mike Lowell was my friend.

Friday, August 14, 2009

I must build one

A little long. You could watch about 30 seconds each in the beginning, middle and end and get the full effect. Pretty cool.

Go-karts and mini-bikes

Things I Saw this Week

A 1980s Caprice. I would have gotten closer, but just as I took this picture the bus I was trying to catch came barreling around the corner up ahead. I almost missed it.

The modern day hobo

I know what you're thinking. Why can't I center my shots? Well, you see, I'm trying to get pictures with my phone without looking like I am taking pictures. All covert like. It's a safety measure.

This looks like fun. Putting it on my list o'things to do.

A Limit on Funny

Think about this the next time you are commenting on a blog or in Facebook or any other medium where your insight may or may not be welcome: when you say something is "too funny" you are putting a limit on funny. You are essentially saying to the commentee that they've crossed the line of an acceptable amount of funny and that they should dial it down a notch to a level more socially acceptable.

"That Charlie Manson, he was too violent"

"I was in New England in January and it was just too cold for me"

"Mexican food can sometimes be too hot for me"

"Did you see that picture of Bobby Joe in the pool on Facebook? It was too funny"

Don't we have enough limits placed on us in our daily lives without trying to quash the funny? The next time you read something and gasp in horror and outrage at how funny it is, just let it go.

Fabulous Movie Review©

I Am David
Released: 2004
Rating: PG (Parental Guidance Suggested)
Length: 1 hr 30 mins
Genre: Drama, Family
Starring: Roberto Attias, Elisabetta Bartolomei, Maria Bonnevie, Viola Carinci, James Caviezel
Primary Contributor: Tibber, Ben
I Am David mysteriously appeared in my Netflix queue one day. Since I had never heard of it I read the summary and was surprised to find out that it was based on a book that I had read (and loved) in the 6th grade called North to Freedom.

I remember the book well because I didn't want to read it, but it ended up being one of my favorites. I had read pretty much every book we had in our classroom, but was avoiding North to Freedom. It was a hard cover book with no jacket therefore the only clue to what the book was about was its titled, which to me meant it was probably about an American slave who escapes to one of the northern states. A reasonable assumption. That topic was pretty much all we ever studied in regards to U.S. History, so I was tired of it. Anyway, I eventually read the book and liked it.

The movie is similarly geared towards families or middle school aged kids. The story is simply told and does not contain all the gratuitous sex and violence and fart jokes you might normally find. Some might find it too tame or boring.
7.5 out of 10 (Very good)

Craigslist Vehicle of the Day

This beauty for a mere $1100*

*I'm not being sarcastic

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Am I dumb?

I don't get it. How someone who arrived at 9:30 and almost immediately upon arriving spent 45 minutes on the phone, and who will almost certainly leave at 5:15, could possibly think it's okay to take a one hour one and a half hour lunch break.

Updating Resume

I am updating the objective on my resume to read:

To work for a company where no-talent clowns who show up late, leave early, use office hours as their private social networking time, take long lunches, follow absolutely none of the accepted coding standards, release code into production that is buggy, ugly and non-functional, expect others to pick up their slack and are generally a drain on the production of their coworkers are not tolerated.

Yip Yip Yip Uh huh

Arriving at 9:20! Twenty-five minutes on a personal call! Whatta life!

Tuesday, August 11, 2009


I love useless comments in code.

'load the repeater


'just like it says, all was good and we need to refresh the right sid iframe

Monday, August 10, 2009

Highly Prized

A highly sought after 2 door. The name of the town he lives in is very unfortunate. I bet after he sells a truck he does a little fist pump.

How About Them Nationals?

Eight in a row! Go Nats! I love that Ryan Zimmerman too. Whatta player.

So Pitted

From FailBlog

Sunday, August 09, 2009

I wasn't planning on it...

but since the government tells me I shouldn't maybe I will. I like to fish, but when I want to eat fish, I just go to the grocery store. Not squeamish about cleaning a fish, it is just less hassle.

Anyway, the people who would eat catfish, or yuck, carp, out of a river running through a good sized city are not going to be persuaded otherwise by some stupid sign. Don't get me wrong, the river's pretty clean, but still, we're talking about long lived animals that suck the shtuff off the bottom.

I remember one time I was fishing in the Salmon Falls River with some friends. I pulled a 4 foot long eel out, it fought like it was a sea monster, but I wussed out and wouldn't take it off the hook. A friend stepped on its head while trying to take the hook out and it coiled around his leg. Eels suck.

Fabulous Movie Review©

Released: 2008
Rating: R (Restricted)
Length: 2 hrs 17 mins
Genre: Drama, War
Starring: Daniel Craig, Liev Schreiber
A good, but kind of unemotional, movie about Jews hiding out in the forest and fighting back against the Germans in World War II. Liev Schreiber was better than Daniel Craig. This is based on a true story, because writers cannot come up with anything original any more and thats fine, but did it really take as long in real life for Zus Bielski (Liev Schreiber) to realize that the Russians were evil?
7 out of 10 (Good)

Thursday, August 06, 2009

Some pretty cool crashes

If you ask me (I know, you didn't) I don't understand why they are crashing. It doesn't look like a very hard hill.

Also, how'd you like to be one of those guys who took some knobbies spinning at 100 mph straight to the kibbles and bits? Ouch.

Speak of the devil

Speaking of Wagoneers with 33 inch tires and 6 inch lifts. Behold:

You know you want one.

Tuesday, August 04, 2009

Be Still My Beating Heart...

Man. I love these old gas guzzling Wagoneers. Just picture it with a 6 inch lift and 33 inch tires.

Fabulous Movie Review©

Enter the Dragon
Released: 8/19/1973
Rating: R (Restricted)
Length: 1 hr 38 mins
Genre: Action
Starring: Bruce Lee, John Saxon, Kien Shih, Ahna Capri, Angela Mao
Directed by: Robert Clouse
Producer: Andre Morgan, Fred Weintraub, Leonard Ho, Paul M. Heller, Raymond Chow
Writer: Michael Allin
The first Bruce Lee movie I have seen and I wasn't disappointed. I love the sound effects. Slow motion, Lee's face twisted with rage, and no sound except for the opponents neck cracking. Awesome.
8.5 out of 10 (Very, very, very good)

Monday, August 03, 2009