Thursday, January 14, 2010

Rejection Hurts

Yeah, so, my truck didn't pass inspection. Big surprise, huh? The odd thing is that it was rejected for items other than what I thought was wrong with it.

Surely, the leak in the exhaust manifold is a problem, right? Nope. Apparently carbon monoxide being sucked into the cab ventilation is OK (I'm glad too. It's a real pain to fix).

Perhaps the almost bald rear tires with multiple plugs in them sealing holes from mobile home debris scattered around by a "twist" that we drove through in West Virginia a few years back. Nuh uh. That's perfectly ok.

Those are the things I was sure would be sticking points for any self-respecting garage. So, what did they find wrong with my truck?

Well, I've got a leaking rear wheel cylinder. Ok, that's legit. I should have pulled the drums off and inspected them, but you know what? I didn't want to. So far the brakes are working excellent. If it ain't broke, don't investigate to see if it is, as they say somewhere.

Next, it was the ABS and BRAKE idiot lights are on. They've been on for a few years, and in my last Dakota, they were on too. For four years. Oh well. I googled it, "Dakota ABS and BRAKE lights on" and I quickly found the answer. A speed sensor in my rear axle. Incidentally, this will also fix one of my other problems which is the speedometer doesn't work until I reach 30 miles an hour.

The third brake light is out. Ok, fine, I can honestly say that when I am checking all the lights, I have never, ever looked at my third brake light. Also, the front sidemarker lights are out too. I didn't even know what those were. My parking lights, headlights and turn signals all work. What more do I need? Apparently, I need sidemarker lights. I still don't know where on the truck they go. I'm guessing right beside the headlight, but it's anybody's guess.

And last but not least, he told me that my left front wheel is "loose". Oh really. Did she come on to you? What does that mean exactly? He couldn't or wouldn't tell me. "Somethin' probably needs to be tightened up. A nut or somethin'". Oh, really, is that all? Or maybe its a wheel bearing assembly and you were waiting to get it disassembled up on a lift before telling me that you are going to charge me a grand to fix it?

He wanted to charge me $500 to fix the leaking rear wheel cylinder and then investigate the ABS/BRAKE light and the "loose" wheel. I politely said, no, that's ok I fix my own stuff. At which point he became a raging jackass. I don't feel like going into detail, but rest assured he is the worst mechanic I have ever been to in my not quite 20 year career of seeking out the sketchiest mechanics I can find. That includes Bob's Towing in Rochester and the guy with the left arm 6 inches shorter than the right arm way out in the boondocks near Swanzey, NH who could have killed me and buried me and nobody would have ever known.

Also, this mechanic had the worst body odor, so now my truck smells like dirty bum.


Rob said...

I had that ABS light thing in my Dakota a couple years ago. The new sensor in the rearend did the trick. It will take you longer to explain the part to the girl at Auto Zone then it will to install it.

gagknee said...

yeah, i had a hard time finding it on the web. i wrote down the part number for when i go to the store to get it.

Rob said...

I've received rejection stickers on my truck the last two years. It cut me deep, real deep.

Big A said...

I find the concept of the rejection sticker hilarious. I actually thought gagknee photo-shopped that picture for the effect.

gagknee said...

its like a scarlet letter.

Rob said...

Have you achieved success yet?

gagknee said...

nope. the weather and sickness prevented me from fixing my exhaust manifold leak last weekend.

i'm still driving it to work. i figure i've got one warning or i could use the excuse "i'm taking it to the garage to get reinspected"