Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Fabulous Movie Review®

Here's how I picture how the creation of this movie went down:

Writer: I've got this awesome script I just wrote which involves three families with three story lines that are interconnected in a colossal way.

Director reads script

Director: This is absolutely phenomenal. You have outdone yourself this time. This is your pièce de résistance. Let's go show the executive producer.

Executive producer reads script

Executive producer: Eh, I dunno. Hasn't this kinda like, ya know, been done before? I think it needs more pizazz. Couldn't you jazz it up a little? Maybe, you could add a fourth interconnected story.

To make a long boring story shorter, a fourth storyline was added and to me it not only didn't add to the other three excellent storylines, it actually kind of detracted from it.

You watch this movie and tell me if you can figure out which storyline I am talking about.

Besides the vestigial thread this is a good movie, but I think it could have been edited down by about 15 or 20 minutes. I liked it however, especially because it exemplies my creed: Never leave this country. Ever. For no reason whatsoever.

Two out of the four families in this movie don't share my creed. If they were real life people and not make believe, I bet they would now.

Incidentally, I just finished reading a book in which the main character didn't follow this tenet either. All the Pretty Horses by Cormac McCarthy. If you are the book reading type, I suggest you visit your local library and pick up this or any of his other literary masterpieces.

The bottom line is this, bad things will happen to you if you leave the U.S.A. So just stay home, ok?

7.5 stars out of 10.


Anonymous said...

Crap! I can only remember two of the four stories.
Mrs. Rants

gagknee said...

which two?

Anonymous said...

The Brad Pitt story and the Mexican woman's story.
Mrs. Rants

gagknee said...

ah, see, you can't even remember the stupid story they tacked on to explain where the moroccans got the gun.