Friday, August 31, 2007

Fabulous Movie Reviews®

Featuring Dirk Diggler as an Army sniper who loses his best friend and decides to live way out in the mountains all by himself with his dog.

Pure unadulterated action movie. That's all this is. Oh, don't get me wrong, the story's not half bad, but it only serves as a necessary evil between all the explosions and kickassery. A very entertaining movie.

Gagknee's Grade: B+

The Hills Have Eyes II
I liked the first The Hills Have Eyes (the remake) and I gave it 3.8 stars out of 5. This one just plain sucked. The dialogue was awful. The characters were pulled straight out of the Stereotyper's Bible. Two white guys, two black guys, two girls and one Hispanic (actually one of the girls was Hispanic too). A lot of "cracker" and "homes" and "i'm a woman and therefore better than you" thrown around. Wow. Original. The story was lame, and there wasn't one scary moment. No tension. Nothing. Bad, bad movie.

To directly quote myself yesterday whilst talking to the Help Desk, "Pretty lame. Pretty laaaame."

Gagknee's Grade: D-

The Simpsons Movie
Wow. WOW. I went into the theater not knowing what to expect. Oh sure, people told me it was good, but since when have I put any stock into what people say? Well, those people were correct. It's the funniest thing to come out of Springfield since Clinton was the President. If they could guarantee the high quality of this film, then they should cancel the TV show and just concentrate on making a movie every other year.

Gagknee's Grade: A


Rob said...

Dangit. I need to see the Simpsons in the theater before it is too late.

Rob said...

The special features on the Shooter DVD were interesting.

gagknee said...

hmmm. i didn't watch them unfortunately.